Open Letter to Pastors from a Post-Abortive Woman

Dear Pastors,

I was asked to write an open letter to pastors.  Someone thought there might be pastors who would like to hear from a woman who has suffered from abortion. I’m not sure there are quite the words to express the feelings one has while watching the world seemingly wake up to the horrors of abortion...horrors that have haunted me and women like me for decades.  Since the issue of abortion is trending, let’s take this opportunity to get the message of healing out. 

 Whatever happens in the months and years ahead, there is a colossal amount of pain that needs to be addressed.  Pastors, you are the ones to do it.  Abortion is a theological issue.  It is not psychological, sociological, or biological.  We are not bodies with souls, we are souls with bodies.  Jesus Christ is the only one who can heal the wounds of abortion.  Yes, Pastors, this puts this issue in your wheelhouse whether you are comfortable with it or not.  There is a generation of men and women out there in pain who need you to understand the effects of abortion and the theological pathway to healing.  The post-abortive man and woman of the church is uniquely different.  They know Jesus.  They cognitively know they are forgiven, but why are they still shackled to the shame?  In group, I asked Jamie, a post-abortive well-versed student of the Bible, “You know the Father will welcome you.  You know He will put a ring on your finger and a robe on your back.  Why can’t you come home?”  She replied, “Because I deserve the pigs.”

 I believe we will see a flood of hurting men and women searching for healing.  Pastors, you might hope to see them streaming through the doors of your church in droves, but the truth is, they are already there.  They have been there.  They are in every Bible study, on every church staff, in every congregational meeting, and sitting on virtually every row.  Please don’t fail them.  Please add the subject of abortion healing to the ministry of your church. Abortion ministry is not counseling. Don’t farm it out.  It is the church’s job because it is Christ’s job. His Word is sufficient. He did not just come with a teaching ministry, but with a teaching and healing ministry.  He restored.  Restoration is more than just reconciliation.  Reconciliation is the cognitive understanding of peace with God.  Restoration is the feeling of wholeness that creates a profound understanding of grace, love, and mercy.  Restoration is the removal of shame.  Where there is no shame, there is no reason to hide.  Nearly half of your church is shackled to the shame of their abortions rendering them less effective to the calling God has placed on their lives.  Break the silence. Break the shame.

I am pro-abortion healing.

I am pro- Shelly who realized that she kept kicking her husband out of the house because she didn’t think she deserved to be loved after her abortion.

I am pro- Marcy who was coerced into having an abortion by her mother and harbored a deep resentment against her for nearly three decades effectively making a relationship with her impossible until she received the healing touch of God’s Word.

I am pro-Rebecca who suffered an intense and dark post-partum depression after her abortion causing her to question her suitability to be a mother.

I am pro-Melissa who detached from her child after a previous abortion because she was afraid that God would take the baby from her and although she was convinced, she deserved the pain, she would not survive the losing of him.

I am pro- Stacy who dated a man that beat her every day for two years after her abortion because she was subconsciously punishing herself.

I am pro-Lilly who was forced to have an abortion so that she could go to college and excel in life only to find herself too traumatized to function, dropped out of school, became addicted to drugs, and turned to the sex trade out of a deep self-loathing.

I am pro-Mason who finally realized his underlying rage issue was unresolved anger from his failure to stop his girlfriend from aborting their child.

I am pro-Caroline who couldn’t be intimate with her husband because of deep feelings of dirtiness from her abortion.

I am pro-abortion healing because I know there are men and women out there who think they have buried their abortions deep and think they are fine.  But they are not.  I know the pain of shame and isolation. I know the healing available in Christ Jesus.  I know a context of love that is unfathomable.  I know a grace so profound it must be shared.  I know the healing touch of my Savior.  I know the power of God’s Word. 

The post-abortive need pastors to mobilize abortion healing ministry within the context of the body of Christ.

 I will never forget the first phone call I received at midnight from a woman I did not know.  She heard my story and got my number from the church directory.  With a tear-filled voice she said, “I had to call you because I need to know, Amy.  Is there hope for me?”

That is their question to you, pastors.  They are sitting in your church silently screaming, “Is there hope for me?”

Please, share Hope. (Thank you to all of you that do.)

In Christ,

Amy Garner
Author, Redeemed for a Reason
Student, Master of Divinity in Theology, Liberty University
Co-founder, Healed by Grace